A few words about your happiness

I've been thinking about this since I became a mother, almost one whole year ago, and I still haven't figured out just quite how to say it. Becoming a mother changes you. It changes the way you see the world, the way you see yourself, what you think is important, and what you hope for. I think that this shifted worldview is common to most (if not all) mothers, and I think I need to try and explain it...

When I look at my daughter, there is so much I feel. I feel a deep love for her, and a resounding sense of pride and amazement that she exists. Given all the complicated steps that have to take place exactly right (in the right order, at the right time) when life is created...it is actually astonishing that we are able to live and breath and learn like we do. When I look at her, I see a perfect little human, with grasping fingers and wiggly toes, big curious eyes, and a smile that can outshine the sun. Then on top of all that...she is smart! She can make sounds and point and walk and explore and recognize people and laugh and even make jokes, and while all this might not seem like much to a grown up (we do most of that stuff everyday) it's pretty damned incredible when you think about the fact that she wasn't bigger than a cell bumpin' around in an ovary two years ago.

So I look at my daughter, and I feel love, and pride, and amazement, and then I start to think about the life I want her to have. I think about the kind of person I hope she will become, and the kind of life she will live. While I can fantasize about her personality and interests, in the end all my hopes for her boil down to a simple wish; I pray for her to be healthy and happy.

This is when those maternal feelings started to change the way I see the world. I would look at toddlers walking down the street with their moms, and imagine Elsa being that age. Then, I started to notice the kids playing in the schoolyard across the street, and imagined my Elsa in school playing at recess. Then, Elsa was the teenagers riding the bus, and then the grown up lady on her way to work.

Every person you encounter in life was once someone's precious little baby, and their mothers wanted nothing more than for them to be healthy and happy...for the world to treat them with kindness and love. The same is true for you. Your mother wants you to be happy, because you are precious, smart, and amazing (I promise...you ARE!). I'll try to remember this from now on, and I think you should, too.

And now for some shameless baby-bragging...

Elsa has a new snowsuit and sled to help us make the most of the never-ending Icelandic winter

Pabbi is a sled-pulling expert

"Elsa lay there like a slug...it was her only defense"

We had a fun visit from Elsa's favorite aunt

Elsa had a code in her doze a few weeks ago. All better now!

Waking up from her nap...I kinda wish I could crawl in there with her!